More me when abroad

More me when abroad

It´s been a while since I have been working with my international colleagues and I have to admit I really miss working in different countries with different people and using different languages. To be honest my last work trip abroad was in October and it seems like forever ago to me. Even though I work in an international atmosphere every day I miss that certain feeling that I have when working abroad.

I have been thinking why I´m so keen on internationalization and meeting new people who come from different cultures and countries.  It is obvious that travelling and working abroad enables me to develop new skills, languages, cultural awareness, social skills but among those I have realized I´m more alert when abroad. I have to focus on language and different cultural habits, but that alertness takes me there what I believe is the reason why I truly love international work.

I believe when I´m working in different challenging situations I´m taken out of my comfort zone, some people find it awkward and unpleasant, especially when they have to work with another language than their own. Instead I find it rewarding and I find myself more true to myself and others. This only tells my story where I come from, why I feel this way and can´t be generalized.

I believe when I´m working out of my comfort zone I´m more likely to drawing strength and security inside of myself. I´m using basic trust that has been given to me on my early childhood. Basic trust is built in early interaction with a child and their care giver. It is an implicit trust that is optimal will happen and a person believes whatever happens will ultimately be fine. It is the confidence that reality is ultimately good, and all that exists, are by their very nature trustworthy. Basic trust gives an implicit orientation towards all circumstances and that allows people to relax and see situations as learning opportunities. Basic trust can be developed in trustful and respectful relationships. Yes, I´m thankful for my early childhood, it has had a remarkable meaning in my life. It has given me the orientation to my life. But why am I so keen on working abroad and with different languages?

When a child feels good about themselves, it sets them up for success. When you are able to carry on this feeling in your life it takes you there.

You can´t choose the family you are born into. I was born in very board-minded, accepting and international one. My mom was sent abroad when she was 16, of course her family had international connections and they had the experience that travelling and meeting other people from different cultures brought some interesting extra into their lives. My grandfather had lived abroad a great part of his adult life, before he was ready to settle down and start a family. So, I was sent abroad when I turned 16 and so was my daughter. In that age of 16 you are vulnerable, but eager to experience. This allows you to a straight and forthcoming connection to who you are, how will your basic trust take over and carry you trough out your life. I was able to have that experience that whatever will happen will ultimately be fine. I had an experience that reality was ultimately good, I could trust myself and find different circumstances trustworthy, but you must remember that this belief had been built in me already.  I could relax and see situations as learning opportunities and that way I also learned from life among new culture and language.

Later on, when I graduated from college it was obvious to me to start my career abroad and I did. I wanted to be contacted to that feeling of vulnerability and confidence at the same time. I have a feeling that when you are forced to that vulnerability you are more open to who you are, you are more you. This is the reason  I enjoy working abroad, being more me, learning more about myself. At the same time, being vulnerable and having this straight and forthcoming connection to who you are, it gives you all the information about yourself. Positive and negative. How you handle all this information is based on your reflective ability.

Reflective ability is a quintessential human capacity that is needed to be able to successfully navigate the information flood that you have inside of you, all the feelings, actions and their co-operation or disconnections. It is learnable process and can be developed through out your life.

You should ask thoughtful reflective questions from yourself to reflect on your actions. When you are merciful and compassionate towards yourself, even how odd and outrageous your actions can be, you will help yourself probe deeper to your complexity and this will encourage you to better self-reflection. Just always pause and ask, why I´m acting this way. Simple as that…

Thoughtful questions to yourself will help you move forward with focus and intent. Trough out these inner conversations you will gain confidence and become more skilled at working through tough problems without hurting yourself or people around you. You will start to spread an atmosphere that allows you among other people to grow towards more aware and better people.

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In two weeks my longing will be over. I will catch the plane and head towards Köln, Germany, to work, but most of all to be more connected to myself. I know I will have situations that I have no clue how the handle them, but I know I can trust myself. I know that whatever will happen will ultimately be fine.

Text Annele Heikkilä

Photo Lia Heikkilä

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why not? Let’s try it!

Most of the time, you can notice that the student who you work whit is going to be ok later of their life. Some of them are maybe trying to find their own way bit diffrently, but it’s all right as we know. In my life I have admired handful of my friends who know what they want in their life. I appreciate that they are willing to do the work what is required to be great in what they do. I did not know what I wanted to be professionally.  So, my way to find a job what I liked happened by accident. It was not planned at all and I was saying to myself

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During my childhood I was lucky that my parents encouraged me and they did not criticize me. Of course, there was times of tough love, but it was needed for sure. One of the best things what I managed to get from my parents was the attitude that I’m going to be ok whatever happens.

A few months ago I was looking my Instagram and I noticed one picture from one of the all-time greats in basketball.  He is Ray Allen and during his career as a professional basketball player he had amazing work ethic. Everyday he worked his craft and became one of the best 3-point shooters in NBA’s history. The headline of the picture that he posted was 10 Things that require zero talent.

10 THINGS

10 THINGS THAT REQUIRE ZERO TALENT

Nowadays one of my biggest challenges is trying to make the changes in students mindsets. In  short term and in long term it is difficult to make difference in students behavior. But as we all know positive mindset is infectious. Doing things a little bit differently is what keeps me going and gives me the edge who I am as a teacher. Once in the while it’s good to remind ourselves of these 10 talents and lets try, why not?

 

Written by Mikko Hankaniemi

Photo by Brandi Rett on Unsplash

Dress code Confidence -What to wear in the Office

Dress code Confidence -What to wear in the Office

How you are perceived by others depends on your first impression. Dressing up helps you build your confidence. Dressing well is often a creative expression of the individual and it can also be one way to boost your confidence. In Icebath we think people dress up to respect other people.

First of all it is important that you will figure out the dress code in the office. I have noticed that in my new job the dress code is confidence with a hint of relaxed humor and academic backgroud gives the well finnished look. Even when you work in the office where the dress code in strictly business attire it is important that you reflect your individual style. How you dress effects how you perform. People tend to perform better in life when they feel that they deserve to perform better. This is important rule when you work at home. If you work with your joggers that has holes in them and your hair finds it own style among your face looks tired with some drool on your cheek, what will you expect form your performance?

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Okey, we have figured out that the company’s dress code is confidence, but how will you reach that? Respecting others is the key to find your confidence. The more you get the other people shine and to do their best the more confident you will be. You don´t need to dress in your most conservative suit, with accessories to match. You can be curios of other people and their skills and competences. You can have an open mind that gives you space to develop yourself and lets you to grow when reflected by other people. People see if you are true with yourself and wheather you are trustworthy or not. You should have a good reflective ability and be keen on evolving in that. Good reflective ability gives you a free pass to better confidence. Collecting information about yourself will help you identify and explore your own practices and underlying beliefs. This will lead to changes and improvements in your own personal growth. People who are confident and selfaware are the people you find it easy to be with. There are no hiding expectations.

What ever the dress code is, if you are able to create an atmosphere where collective aspiration can be set free and people are keen to learn from each other you have nailed it. In every office and workplace the dress code should be based on good mentalizing and reflective ability. There should be good conversations that reveals people capacity to understand themselves and others in terms of intentional mental states, such as feelings, desires, wishes, goals and attitudes. Mentalizing is a quintessential human capacity that is needed to be able to successfully navigate the social world. There should be thoughtful reflective questions that are designed to help teams at the workplaces to reflect on their practice. Using carefully chosen questions will allow people to probe for deeper complexity and encourage them to self reflection. Thoughtful questioning help people to move forward with focus and intent. Trough these kind of conversations people will gain confidence and become more skilled at working through tough problems without hurting each other or themselves. Being able to work in this kind of athmosphere the work community will develop the skills and tools to handle similar issues in the future independently. It allow us to grow towards more aware and a better persons.

No matter how casual the office is, it’s never appropriate to wear primitive defenses in interaction with other people. You always must be responsible of your own reactions among curious why you act the way you do, especially when under a lot of stress or questioned about your choices. Self-observation and self-evaluation are crucial and will lead to better self-awareness and confidence.

Make sure that people always have confident feeling when around you. Minimize sarcastic humor, it can always be miss understood. Keep rude, racist and offensive comments away. Treat people the way you wish they´ll treat you. Be always on time, because being late is a way of using power and disrespecting other people. Bring your smile with you to work, greet your colleagues and be also interested about their personal lives. Be the best version of you.

Save your cologne or perfume for the other occasions, and let your co-workers realize how freshly you want see and think. Let them enjoy how groomed you are and how eager you are to learn and develop yourself with them among the organization. Make excellent impression of you and stick to the dress code.

To boost your confidence spend a few minutes spiffing yourself in the mirrow before you leave home. Reinforces the idea that you deserve success and good treatment in your own mind. When you respect yourself, your respect others. Don’t forget the red lipstick it always makes the day, no matter how strict the dress code is!

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Written by Annele Heikkilä

Photos edited by Mikko Hankaniemi, Photo White Shirt Michael Frattaoli on Unsplash, LipstickSamuel Zeller on Unsplash